Blurb
Cam
Social anxiety's been my constant companion for twenty-three years, sometimes in the background, sometimes silencing me and yanking my guts out in the nearest trash can. No matter how much I love playing music, I'm never going to get up on a stage and perform in front of a crowd. But since I met Erik, and was asked to join his band Hellsbane, that knowledge hurts worse.
No heart (even Erik's) or dick (even Erik's) is big enough to carry me past my limits, but God, I wish there was a way.
Erik
Life's damned unfair when a guy with the voice of a hard-rock angel and a songwriting talent like Cam's can only post anonymous videos online. But you can't cure anxiety with wanting, or willpower. My drummer needs to quit trying to push Cam onstage with us before he breaks.
Rocktoberfest's still our goal, and touring with Hellsbane was my only ambition, until I met Cam. Now I can't have everything I love in one place, but dammit, I wish there was a way.
A first-times, life challenges, coming out, rockstar romance.
Hidden Blade is part of the multi-author The Road to Rocktoberfest 2022 series. Each book can be read as a standalone, but why not read them all and see who hits the stage next? Hot rockstars and the men who love them, what more could you ask for? Kick back, load up your kindle and enjoy the men of Rocktoberfest!
Excerpt
Cameron
“You suck.” I glared at Andre as I clutched the puke bucket between my knees.
“Hey, you did it, dude.” He took his eyes off the road for a second to grin at me. “You got through a whole set and walked off that stage with your head held high.”
“And my intestines climbing out my mouth.”
“Ew, gross image.”
“You’re a nurse. You eat gross images for breakfast.”
Andre threw his head back and laughed. “Okay, you got me. But seriously, wasn’t that even a little bit cool?”
“The bit where I puked in the john before I went onstage, or the part where I got as far as the dumpster down the block afterward?”
“Oh, the dumpster. For sure.” He patted my knee. “I won’t push you anymore. But you were a hit. If you wanted a job or a good fuck, they were lining up to offer it to you. Maybe both at the same time.”
“Hah. Bullshit.” I’m skinny and beanpole-tall and I haven’t cut my hair in years because reasons, and I have this nose that I only don’t hate because it’s just like my dad’s was.
“I mean it.” At the stoplight he fished in his pocket and pulled out a card. “Lead singer of this group was drooling all over your set and he came looking for you like a moose hunting its mate when you were done.”
“You make him sound so appealing.” I took the card from his fingers. “Apparently I could’ve fucked a moose. Wow.”
“Or been fucked by.” The light turned and Andre hit the gas. “He wasn’t that bad, for an older dude. I know you like them with some years on ’em.”
“Shut up, Bones.”
“Only the truth, Spock.”
I chuckled, despite the acid still churning around in my stomach. No one on the planet knew me as well as Andre, and in one regrettably truthful moment years back I’d spilled my attraction to silver foxes and solid older men. He liked to tease me, but never in a mean way, and he kept bigger secrets of mine than that one. “I’m not trying to get laid.”
“You should be. Seriously, Cam, you’ve been with what, two guys in your whole life? A man has needs, or so I tell Lyssa every day.”
“That girl is way too good for you.”
“Woman, Cameron. Don’t let the g-word cross your lips. And you’re damn right she’s too good for me. The key is never letting her figure that out, am I right?”
“Sure. Whatever you say.” Andre was the best. His clowning was intended to distract me, keeping my anxious brain from fixating on what-the-shit-did-I-just-do??? Which I shouldn’t have let myself think about, dammit, and I flipped the card over in my fingers to focus on something else. Hellsbane. A familiar band logo and on the next line, Erik Svenson - lead guitar and vocals. With a phone number, an email, Instagram, Bandcamp, and Twitter.
Hellsbane’s business card! I’d known they’d be there, of course, even if we deliberately arrived only just in time for my set, so I hadn’t heard them play. And if they’d been in the audience, I hadn’t recognized a single face in the one panicked look I’d allowed myself. Although… There’d been a big blond, bearded guy up front who might’ve been their lead singer… Our eyes had met, and he hadn’t laughed at the fear in mine.
Was that Erik? Watching me? Fuck, maybe I should’ve played my new song, even if the chorus wasn’t polished yet. Or not skipped that instrumental bridge, except if I’d stopped singing, I might not’ve started again. How bad did I screw up in front of Erik Svenson?…
About the Author
I get asked about my name a lot. It's not something exotic, though. “Kaje” is pronounced just like “cage” – it’s an old nickname, and my pronouns are she/her/hers. I’ve been writing far longer than I care to admit (*whispers – forty-five years*), although mostly for my own entertainment. I write M/M romance, often with added mystery, fantasy, historical, SciFi, paranormal… I also have Young Adult short stories (some released under the pen name Kira Harp.)
After decades of writing just for fun, my husband convinced me I really should submit something, somewhere. My first professionally published book, Life Lessons, came out in May 2011. I now have a good-sized backlist in ebooks and print, both free and professionally published, including Amazon bestseller The Rebuilding Year and Rainbow Award Best Mystery-Thriller Tracefinder: Contact. A complete list with links can be found on my website "Books" page at https://kajeharper.com/books/.
Social Media Links
Audible Profile | Blog/Website | Newsletter Sign-up
Facebook | Facebook Group: Kaje's Conversation Corner
Goodreads Author page | BookBub
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My review:
4.5 out of 5 stars
“Hidden Blade” by Kaje Harper is part of the shared-world series, ‘Road to Rocktoberfest’, and features Erik, lead vocalist and guitarist for the group Hellsbane, and Cam, a younger, painfully shy but talented singer/songwriter. Although they mesh well at songwriting, their painful pasts may make any personal relationship too much of an obstacle to get past. Then comes the chance of a lifetime, and they have to decide what price they’re willing to pay for fame.
This contemporary gay romance is written by one of my favorite authors in this genre, and as usual, the characters immediately captured my attention and became real to me. I was invested in their story, ached at the trauma they’d experienced, and I anxiously waited for them to discover a way to get past the multiple challenges they faced. It was fascinating to get a glimpse of the hard work and dedication required to mesh as a band, and the creative process was fun to watch. I identified with Cam’s social anxiety, although I’m very glad that I don’t have it to his extent, but his arc was a creative example of finding a way to cope.
I enjoyed this tale so much that I rushed through the first time, impatient to see how things turned out, then reread the story so I could savor the nuances. I suspect this will be another of Ms. Harper’s stories that I revisit again and again, and I hope to see more of these guys at some point in their future.
A copy of this title was provided for review
